Wellness + Wisdom Episode 529
Wellness + Wisdom Podcast Host and Wellness Force Media CEO, Josh Trent, shares how to become a more conscious parent.
In this solocast, you will learn:
- What conscious parenting is and why awareness is key if you want to be a conscious parent.
- Why conscious parenting starts with ourselves.
- The difference between awareness and mindfulness.
- How wounded leaders are made.
- Wellness + Wisdom Podcast: Self Sabotage
- How deep breathing and meditation can help you when you get triggered.
- Why you need to be authentic in the interaction with your children.
- How positive reinforcement technique alters your child's nervous system.
- The importance of active listening with your eyes and ears.
- What emotional intelligence is and how you can teach your child to recognize their emotions.
- Why you need to lead an open dialogue and provide a safe space for your child to express themselves.
- How to respect your children's needs and views, and set healthy boundaries.
- What it means to acknowledge mistakes.
- How to create independence and respect for autonomy.
- Why you should use yourself as an example to encourage a life of wellness.
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Listen To Episode 529 As Josh Trent Uncovers The Best Tips For Parents To Raise Their Children Consciously
Being a conscious parent is no easy task; it requires dedication, awareness, and mindfulness. But it's worth it!
Let's explore the nuances and most important takeaways to embodying the values and virtues of a conscious parent.
We'll also look at some funny – but authentic – ways to heal our families and ourselves.
By the end of this article, you'll be empowered with 11 ways to be a more conscious, loving, and present parent so that your children can grow up and you can overcome any generational pain issues that you yourself are unknowingly projecting onto your child.
I know, it might sound really deep at first, but is there anything deeper than being a parent, seriously? Okay, let's get started!
What is Conscious Parenting?
Parenting is one of the most important and challenging jobs in the world.
It involves raising and nurturing a child to become a responsible, independent, and successful adult.
Conscious parenting is a parenting style that emphasizes mindfulness, awareness, and intentionality in the way we raise our children.
Understanding Conscious Parenting
Conscious parenting is about being fully present and engaged with our children.
It involves being aware of our own thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, as well as those of our children.
By practicing conscious parenting, we can create a more harmonious and fulfilling relationship with our children and also with ourselves!
Some key principles of conscious parenting include:
- Awareness + Mindfulness: Being present in the moment with our children.
- Think of mindfulness as a magnifying glass, that redirects attention towards awareness. It's easy to get these two mixed up, but one is definitely different than the other.
- Emotional intelligence: Understanding and regulating our own emotions, as well as helping our children develop emotional intelligence.
- Empathy: Tuning into our children's needs and feelings.
- Positive discipline: Using positive reinforcement rather than punishment to encourage good behavior.
- Authenticity: Being true to ourselves as parents and modeling authenticity for our children.
Benefits of Conscious Parenting
Conscious parenting has numerous benefits for both parents and children.
Some of these benefits include:
Greater connection: By being present and attentive to our children's needs, we can create a deeper connection with them.
Improved communication: When we practice empathy and emotional intelligence, we can communicate more effectively with our children.
Better behavior: Positive discipline techniques are more effective at encouraging good behavior than punishment or negative reinforcement.
Increased self-awareness: As we become more mindful of our own thoughts and feelings, we can develop greater self-awareness as parents.
Top 11 Ways To Practice Becoming More Conscious In Parenting
Practicing conscious parenting requires effort and intentionality.
Here are the top 11 ways for incorporating conscious parenting into your daily life:
- Do the deepest work possible on yourself and encourage that in your partner or spouse. The more clearing of unconscious, painful projections you take ownership of, the less your children and your partner will suffer. Many times parents unknowingly self sabotage their own love and then don't have that love to give to their children. This is why you see so many wounded leaders in the world because their parents didn't love themselves, and so they couldn't give that to their children, and those children grow up to be leaders of corporations, and in politics even presidents.
- Practice mindfulness meditation or other mindfulness exercises to help you stay present in the moment with your child. Use breathwork to help you understand your emotions and how to regulate them over at BREATHE | Breath + Wellness: A 21-day guided breathing journey.
- Be authentic in interactions with your child, showing them who you truly are rather than trying to be someone else.
- Use positive reinforcement techniques such as praise or rewards to encourage good behavior rather than punishment.
- Listen actively when your child speaks to you, tuning in to their body language as well as their words.
- Model emotional intelligence by regulating your own emotions and teaching your child how to recognize their own emotions. A great resource is Dr. Stan Tatkin for “attachment styles.”
- Engage in open dialogue about difficult topics and provide a safe space for children to express themselves without fear of judgment or punishment.
- Respect each individual's unique needs and worldviews while still setting healthy boundaries within the family dynamic.
- Acknowledge mistakes made on both sides, but focus more on problem solving rather than blame. Be sure to take a good look at the resource “It Didn't Start With You“
- Foster independence and respect for autonomy early on by encouraging children make decisions from an informed place whenever possible.
- Encourage a life of wellness! Use self-care practices such as play, dance, yoga, journaling, art therapy, and creative expression that will help foster personal growth and connection within the family system.
By practicing conscious parenting techniques like these, you can create a stronger bond with your child while also helping them develop into happy, healthy adults!
Being Present With Our Children
Dr. Shefali Tsabary provides an overview in her TEDx talk of the concept of conscious parenting as well as some tips for incorporating it into your daily life.
Through her background as a clinical psychologist specializing in family therapy, Dr. Shefali Tsabary explains why we need to practice conscious parenting in order to create more harmonious relationships with our children.
She introduces the principles of conscious parenting such as emotional intelligence, empathy, mindfulness, and respecting individuality while emphasizing how important it is not just to be present with our children physically but also mentally.
Dr. Tsabary details some strategies that can be implemented when practicing conscious parenting such as being authentic with ourselves and modeling this behavior for our children by tuning into their needs instead of imposing our own ideas onto them.
Ultimately she argues that by practicing these techniques parents can not only create stronger connections with their offspring but help them become healthy happy adults.
Healing Generational Trauma
Science is leaning in the same direction as Dr. Tsabary from many reputable, respected sources.
Looking at the Wellness + Wisdom Podcast episode “How to Heal Generational Trauma” features an interview with Mark Wolynn, a leading expert in the field of inherited family trauma.
Wolynn discusses how trauma can be passed down from one generation to another and how it can affect our mental and physical health.
Wolynn explains that generational trauma occurs when unresolved emotional pain is passed down through the generations.
He believes that this pain can manifest in physical symptoms, such as chronic pain or autoimmune disorders, as well as mental health issues like anxiety and depression.
To heal from generational trauma, Wolynn suggests starting by acknowledging its existence and recognizing how it has affected your life.
He also recommends exploring your family history to understand where the trauma originated from.
It Didn't Start With You
Wolynn emphasizes the importance of understanding that we are not responsible for the trauma that has been passed down to us, but we are responsible for healing it.
Mark encourages individuals to seek out therapy or other forms of support to help them process their emotions and heal from past traumas.
In addition to therapy, Wolynn recommends practices such as meditation and mindfulness to help individuals connect with their emotions and release pent-up emotional pain.
The author also suggests engaging in activities that bring joy and pleasure into your life, as this can help counteract the negative effects of generational trauma.
Overall, Wolynn's message is one of hope: while generational trauma can have a profound impact on our lives, it is possible to heal from it with the right tools and support.
Emotional Epigenetics? What you don't know that you don't know
A fantastic resource is the Wellness + Wisdom Podcast's “Solocast: Emotional Epigenetics” which explores the concept of emotional epigenetics and its impact on our mental health.
Here we discuss how our emotions can affect our genes and how understanding this connection can help us improve our wellbeing.
We explain that emotional epigenetics refers to the idea that our emotions can activate or deactivate certain genes, which can have a profound impact on our health.
For example, chronic stress can activate genes that contribute to inflammation, leading to a range of health problems such as heart disease and autoimmune disorders.
To improve our emotional epigenetics, Trent suggests focusing on practices such as mindfulness, meditation, and gratitude.
These practices have been shown to reduce stress and promote positive emotions, which can help deactivate harmful genes and promote overall wellbeing.
Collectively, we also can emphasize the importance of self-awareness in improving emotional epigenetics.
By becoming more aware of our emotions and how they affect us, we can take steps to manage them in a healthy way and prevent them from negatively impacting our genes.
No matter where you are on your stage of the parenting journey, it's an incredible connection between emotions and genetics, and offers practical tips for improving emotional wellbeing through mindfulness and self-awareness.
How can self-awareness improve emotional epigenetic expression?
Self-awareness can play a crucial role in improving emotional epigenetics.
By becoming more aware of our emotions and how they affect us, we can begin to take steps to manage them in a healthy way.
When we experience negative emotions such as stress or anxiety, it can activate harmful genes that contribute to inflammation and other health problems.
However, by recognizing these emotions and taking steps to manage them through practices such as mindfulness and meditation, we can deactivate these harmful genes and promote positive emotional states.
Self-awareness also allows us to identify patterns in our emotional responses and recognize triggers that may lead to negative emotions.
By understanding these triggers, we can take proactive steps to avoid or address them before they lead to harmful gene expression.
In addition, self-awareness helps us develop a better understanding of ourselves and our unique emotional needs.
This knowledge allows us to make more informed decisions about the activities we engage in and the people we surround ourselves with, which can have a significant impact on our emotional state.
Overall, self-awareness is an essential tool for improving emotional epigenetics.
By becoming more aware of our emotions and how they affect us, we can take proactive steps to manage them in a healthy way and promote overall wellbeing.
Why do parents pass on unconscious behaviors to their children?
As parents, we often strive to raise our children with the best of intentions. We want them to be happy, healthy, and successful in life.
However, despite our best efforts, many of us end up passing on unconscious behaviors and patterns to our children without even realizing it.
Unconscious behaviors are those that we engage in without conscious thought or awareness.
These can include things like negative self-talk, emotional reactions, and even physical mannerisms.
While these behaviors may seem harmless on the surface, they can have a significant impact on our children's development and wellbeing.
One reason why parents pass on unconscious behaviors to their children is due to the power of modeling.
Children learn by observing the behavior of those around them, particularly their parents.
When we engage in certain behaviors repeatedly, our children begin to internalize these actions as normal and may start engaging in them themselves.
For example, if a parent frequently engages in negative self-talk or puts themselves down in front of their child, that child may begin to internalize these beliefs about themselves as well.
This can lead to low self-esteem and other negative outcomes later in life.
Unresolved Emotional Issues = emotionally broken kids
Another reason why parents pass on unconscious behaviors is due to unresolved emotional issues from their own childhoods.
Many of us carry emotional baggage from past experiences that we may not even be aware of.
These unresolved emotions can manifest as unconscious behaviors that we then pass on to our children.
For example, if a parent grew up in an environment where they were constantly criticized or belittled by their own parents, they may unconsciously engage in similar behavior towards their own children without realizing it.
So how can we break this cycle of passing on unconscious behaviors to our children? The first step is awareness – becoming aware of our own behavior patterns and how they may be impacting our children is key.
Being mindful of the messages we are sending through both our words and actions can help us identify any harmful patterns that need addressing.
Another important step is seeking support for any unresolved emotional issues from our past.
This could involve therapy or counseling sessions with a licensed professional who can help us work through these emotions and develop healthier coping mechanisms.
Lastly, modeling positive behavior is crucial for breaking this cycle.
By consciously engaging in positive self-talk and modeling healthy ways of managing emotions like stress or anger, we can set a positive example for our children and teach them healthy habits for life.
In conclusion, while it may be challenging to break the cycle of passing on unconscious behaviors to our children, it is possible with awareness and effort.
By being mindful of the messages we send through both words and actions, seeking support when needed for any unresolved emotional issues from the past, and setting a positive example through modeling positive behavior ourselves –we can help ensure that future generations grow up with healthier habits than previous ones did.
Takeaway: Learn How To Be More LOVING
Conscious parenting is a parenting style that focuses on creating an emotionally attuned, respectful, and mindful relationship with your child.
It encourages parental presence and aware communication while also fostering independence, emotional intelligence, and self-awareness in children.
All of the theories and resources you have explored in this article are nothing compared to the power of loving yourself.
Remember: The greatest gift you could ever give to your children is loving yourself and learning how to love your partner, even when you are triggered by their behaviors.
To learn more and explore some of the resources and training head over to the Wellness + Wisdom Podcast website and search for “conscious parenting” in the hourglass on the upper right of the page.
Links From Today's Show
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